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entertainment fiction humor Lifestyle

2/14/20 Friday Fictioneers


Friday Fictioneers

From the directors of Why am I drinking this yellow water anyway? comes the stinking awful …

Grating on our nerves: Sounds of the Sewer…the show where you have to quickly decide if your clues to the $10 prize are leading to the gutter or … 

Stay tuned to find out…

Does Larry the plumber take the plunge or does he run when he hears …

”Look at this one, Williams.it just makes me want to cry a little. What’s your problem? Didn’t want to be alloyed before asbestos, huh,?You tapping out because it’s cold? Waaaa waaaa waaa … “
“Who’s the lucky jerk gonna be today ..time to fake a clog and then accidentally…
“Haha …longest ride his ass will ever take .. last year we had people sad about only two moons … ”
 
The following is the photo prompt, thank you Rochelle Wisoff for all you do ❤️

 

 

 

 

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Lifestyle

The OtherShip


Friday Fictioneers 3/22/19

The blonde girl sitting next to me was getting impatient. A few more minutes passed before she spoke in a shaky voice.

“I don’t mean to question you, but something is off here. We’ve been up and down, around and around and in a circle more times than I can count and still I’m looking at the same landscape each time.”

“And that’s not all, I haven’t even mentioned the people who keep getting on and off … while we sit here.”

“The people who don’t look like our people. “

“I’m going to guess this isn’t our ship.”

“AM I RIGHT ? ”

Friday fictioneers is a weekly challenge set by Rochelle Wisoff Fields to write a 100-word story in response to a photo prompt. You can find other stories here.

You are invited to the Inlinkz link party!

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Lifestyle

Pick up the almighty pen and focus on writing, damn it !


I feel like you need this post. I feel like I need this post. Maybe I just want to feel like I saved you, just like the guy in a Taylor Swift song. Whatever the reason, the fact remains the same : Friends don’t let friends write while distracted. Read on and if nothing else, humor me.

I am a distracted writer. It’s the reason I haven’t written lately. I’m so distracted by anything going on around me that I get absolutely nothing down on paper. The simple journey from my brain to the outside world is made into a death-spiraling vortex of nothingness because I get distracted. Then before I know it, it’s like I drank from the waters of the Lethe because I don’t remember what inspired me. Today ,I am changing that because I’m writing a post from start to finish without stopping. Just to let my number one enemy in being productive know that it’s over.I’ll call it the Kanye of writing. Here’s my do’s and don’ts to stop this madness and get to what you love -Writing.

We have all been there. No matter what your intentions were this morning or at midnight, remember that the road to hell was paved with good ones, too. Great thoughts are easily lost in space when you let yourself be interrupted by another person, place or thing. The following phrases are my mantra for these problems. I’d say they were tried and true but in all reality, I just thought of them.

Don’t be a Kanye and let Taylor finish. Don’t be a Taylor and let Kanye interrupt.
Above video clip : Taylor Swift playing the part of you ,the writer and Kanye West as the distraction or reason you can’t write.
Now how do you do this, you ask? It’s easy. Channel your inner Ozzy and shut yourself in the pantry -only do it intentionally. For you young ones out there, check the clip out below and you’ll get it, I promise. Actually the following may or may not contain the memorable scene as I got distracted while looking for it and this is a post about fighting writing distraction. In any case, the message is the same. Put your phone up. Put your dog up. Put your kids up. Put your husband up. Or put yourself up.  
Be an Ozzy and remember why you are in the pantry.

Don’t be a Sharon and let Ozzy out of the pantry.

Now, I admit the pantry might not be the best place to find solitude. I prefer my shut yourself walk-in closet, with its comforting plush carpet and racks of beautiful designer shoes and purses. What did you expect from me? Sorry, I let Kim Kardashian take over my thoughts for a second.
Photo by shattha pilabut on Pexels.com
The point is that you need solitude and that place can be anywhere you can find it. Next let’s address those two words that bring a shudder of knowing empathy and horror to writers everywhere, Writer’s Block. I’ve struggled with this mainly because I let myself. I thought I was supposed to have it. At least occasionally. So I invited it. Like Jonathan Harker walking into Dracula’s castle, I entered the portal to writer’s block freely and of my own will. I’m telling you that you don’t have to allow this bloodletting. So put the term writers’ block out of your mind by using whatever form of mental garlic that is effective for you. For me, it’s word prompts weekly writing challenges or even crossword puzzles. These instantly stimulate me, and I feel like I have become a better writer from them as well. Next, and an essential part of the process for me is to be constant and consistent in the writing process. This goes back to the distraction issue. Writing time is not the time to use new writing software or a program that you are just learning. If you are struggling, stick with one that you feel comfortable with or go back to what you started writing your blog posts on in the beginning. I started my blog over a year ago on my iPhone, and I’m finishing this post on it now. I’ll go back and edit on my laptop, but writing on my phone stops me from trying to edit as I write. What was that, you cry? You said to put your phone up. I meant you need to limit the distractions and focus. You get the gist so stop being so literal and listen to my last bit of basic af knowledge already. Sometimes the most crucial for me at least is to take a break from all things deemed social media every once and a while. I just did this, and it seems to have rejuvenated me. Hopefully, it lasts. If not, then I will retreat to my pantry/ closet with none to distract me, do some wordy things like prompts and challenges, and I almost forgot – take a favorite book with me. When all else fails, reading a favorite book is the cure for the non -writing blues.
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
I love to hear from my readers. What are some of your go-to, favorite books? Leave them in the comments section below! If you couldn’t tell, one of mine is Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Until next time, thanks for reading and subscribing to my blog!
Categories
fiction humor Lifestyle

If History Lived on Twitter


Previously on the lifestyles of the French and Fickle….we met the future Queen of France, learned that the French are a bit extra and that Marie Antoinette misses her dogs and dear mama.

http://basicaf.blog/2018/10/13/history-live/

http://basicaf.blog/2018/09/13/historical-horoscopes-deuxieme-partie/

http://basicaf.blog/2018/09/12/marie-antoinette-gossip-in-versailles/

Categories
fiction humor

Marie Antoinette’s Foibles a la Versailles: Introduction to Court


Next week…. I was informed that I cannot go into Paris yet . But I’m not allowed to complain, as it’s an honor to be introduced to the city and given the key by the Parisian Mayor himself. Whatever!

Previously on Real Housewives of Versailles, the newly minted Dauphine of France, Marie Antoinette, was making waves by throwing some serious shade at one lady who wasn’t putting up with that nonsense.

Last we heard, our little Austrian was about to make her mama proud by speaking to Madame Dubarry, the king’s mistress and most powerful woman in court. The whole court is betting it’s as dramatic as the events leading up to this unprecedented event. Gossip mongers hint that the French Dauphine had to be strongly encouraged to acknowledge King Louis XIV’s mistress. This is unheard of, making it very clear that Madame DuBarry rules at Versailles. What words will our beloved blunderbuss Marie A. bestow upon the favorite of the king?

 We don’t have to wait long for the “Made to Shop ” future queen of France, to toss the tea at her much older frenemy, the much more experienced and linguistically talented Madame Dubarry.

The court is live streaming from the Hall of Mirrors. Let’s catch up on the drama unfolding as we speak.

@versailles99…The Dauphine said hello or something like that and now everyone’s favorite cake loving Austrian, Maria Josepha Antonia or Marie Antoinette to the Frenchies is soo done by the look on her face. She’s not even trying to hide her distaste. But look at her fab hair! It has to be at least 3 feet high! What a great hairpiece! Is that a real bird in there?

I think I said something stupid like “wow, look at all the people here today! That woman looked at me like she was disappointed. I guess she was expecting a little more than that. ”

-Marie Antoinette, Dauphine and Future Queen and Daughter of the Holy Roman Empire itself 

@MsMarieAntoinette92…I’m glad I didn’t know that she was really expecting us to be friends now or maybe I would have been like I’m sorry. but you can’t sit with us. Like ever.”

@MsMarieAntoinette92…I can say that, amirite? I’m going to be a Queen, oui?

@mamatherese98 … I see that you are learning about etiquette and how to make friends at court even when you hate them! Look how well it’s worked for me.

@MadameDBarry: That’s right! Recognize the favorite of the king. That little twit can go back to Australia. Or Austria. Or Even better, Antartica.

Two gorgeous woman in bedroom Versailles and Baroque vintage style, ladies laying at beautiful and luxurious interior. Concept of rest and relax in luxury hotel

@secretlivesofversailles89… finally, we learned that the court is indeed crowded but what did I wear? What did she wear? What was on her head? Is that a bird? That silly Austrian is so fashionable! Not.
@MsMarieAntoinette92… you think we could get on with more pressing news like that headpiece I wore reaching 3 foot and housing a live bird inside! I’m sure I will be starting a trend with that!

@versailles99…So now that we know what to expect in the French court regarding the feud of the woman who acts like a Queen but is not feeling the love from the newcomer … a little foreigner who has bad hair and a stupid laugh. I heard that Marie Antoinette has been to the king himself crying over his displeasure and that he was considering breaking the alliance with Austria but needs the money. I’m told that he has never liked to confront problems but chooses to be charming while insisting that his orders will be obeyed.

A far cry from Mother Austria  aka Marie Therese who is known for a more hardcore approach to ruling and doesn’t believe in mincing words. Am I right in the assumption that this one disastrous alliance? The marriage of the two polar opposites can only mean one thing -that the British are laughing instead of crying in their tea right now.

Until next week, auvoir! I’m sure we haven’t heard the last of this dignified catfight …

Categories
Lifestyle

Starstruck


https://rochellewisoff.com/2018/12/12/14-december-2018/

“MARS! Stop laughing! Read this and tell me it’s not Helios! That cheater! I could have anyone with this geography! ” Gaia screamed and pointed to the computer screen.

For Sale By Cosmos :

Nice, bright, little star ideal for a solar system with 9 planets and no black holes. Gassy little gem has a steamy mix of helium,
carbon, nitrogen, hydrogen, and oxygen. Perfect for tiny space rocks without the hassle of a hypergiant. UV ray
‘s optional.

Gaia continued ” …Do you know what this means?”

Mars shook his head and sighing replied:” I’m afraid to ask .”

“Another ice age. That’s what. ”

dec14fridayfiction

Copyright: Douglas M. MacIlroy

Categories
Lifestyle

Friday Fictioneers : Railroaded


rr-tracks-at-harpers-ferryc

Photo Credit ©Dawn M. Miller

7 December 2018

”Hey, aren’t you…”

The lady in 1B was a dead ringer for an actress in a movie he had just seen. The blonde smiled then shrugged her shoulders.

“I know you probably get this all the time but you look just like her! The way you played the rich lady who offed her old man and…”

…” escaped on a train? You’re right, I do get that often, ” the lady finished for him. And smiling, she held his gaze as the last bubbles disappeared with the river’s current.

“Mr. John Smith? Please come with us. You’re under arrest for the murder … ”